Leif The Defender

Posted on February 7, 2010 by Michael McIntosh

Friday was Gavin’s Tae Kwon Do day. We arrived 30 minutes early to class so I let Leif and Gavin play bin the grass by the beach. After a while, the instructor showed up with her dog, Oprah. The kids ran around with the her and played catch and all that good stuff. At 8 o’clock it was time for class to start. It was a very small class. Literally. Only 3 students showed up for class and they were all Gavin’s age and size. Needless to say, it was kind of a fun class. Leif was loving it too. He was able to run around the room, play with Oprah, and interact with the other kids.

At the beginning of class, Leif pulled a hand target out of the equipment bag and put his hand. He seemed to know what it was because he was going up to the other kids and holding it up so they could kick it. The two other kids in the class were lightly tapping the target with their foot. Leif turned to Gavin and held up the target. Gavin looked at him and swung his foot hard right to the target. Leif’s hand swung around like a pinwheel and then he gave Gavin stink eye. Gavin felt bad and only tapped it from then on. I think Leif will be bullying his older brother in a year or two.

Later, when it was time to run laps, the instructor clapped her hands and yelled, “Line up!”. Leif obeyed and followed the kids to the starting point. “Ready…” the instructor called. Leif stopped and turned toward her. “Go!” The three kids bolted for the next corner and Leif followed as fast as his feet would go right behind them. As they turned the corner, Leif turned towards the next corner, a ways behind them. The kids turned the next corner and Leif turned to face them still. By the end of the second lap, Leif was in the center of the room running in small tight circles. It was so cute.

The kids had a good class. It was a good opportunity for the instructor to focus on her younger students while also being able to have fun. The end of class, as usual, is sparring time. Only two of the 3 kids there are advanced enough to free spar. Gavin was one of them. Leif again decided to join the fun. He grabbed a piece of headgear from the bag and I helped him get it onto his head. He ran around with Gavin and the other boy who was geared up and was having a blast. But then I had to contain him so the two boys could spar. They faced each other, bowed, and were instructed to start. They went at each other furiously. The other boy had the upper hand over Gavin. Leif wasn’t having it. He got up and ran into the middle of the fight. The instructor called “break” so Leif wouldn’t get bashed, but Lief ran straight for Gavin’s opponent, headgear still on, flailing his arms. He was in attack mode. 1 1/2 years old and already defending his older brother. It was quite a site to see. I hauled Leif back to the side so the kids could finish up their sparring.

The three boys lined up for the end of class. Since the kids were all white belts and Gavin was the first in line, he got to act as the high ranking student and called for the bow to the instructor. The three kids and Leif really enjoyed their private class. In turn, the instructor seemed to enjoy having a small group of good kids.

Address to a Haggis

Posted on January 31, 2010 by Michael McIntosh

I made my trip to Oahu this weekend for the annual Burn’s Night dinner. Naturally I stayed with Mary for the weekend. Since I didn’t officially practice the dances I was supposed to learn, I was hoping to practice and go over them before the big night. I totally forgot that I told Mary I would help her install the window regulator she had just received for her broken Beetle. Good thing I stayed up Friday night studying the YouTube video some more.

Saturday morning we pulled out all her tools, looked up a few directions, and pulled apart her door. It wasn’t all that hard to get apart. It was getting it back together that was a little tricky. We had to use the dremel to remove some rivets, a hammer to install a few plastic pegs, some new screws to reinstall the speaker, and various other random tools to be able to squeeze the new regulator into place. It took us a few hours from start to finish, but when we were done, the window went up and down at the flip of a switch. Unfortunately, after double checking everything, we realized that now you can’t open the car from the inside. A minor detail that would have to wait. It was now time to clean up and get dressed for the reason I flew over. Robert Burns.

Dressed all in our finery, we hopped in the wee bug and drove off to the Hawaii Convention Center. Such a beautifully built and well designed building. Upon arriving we were moved pretty quickly to the stage for our pre-dinner practice, which went pretty well. A few minor things to try to remember, but nothing we couldn’t handle. After practicing the country dances, I was gathered to practice the highland dance. This made me nervous because this will have been the first time I actually practiced it using my feet. Up until that point, I was watching youTube videos and memorizing the patterns in my brain. Apparently this worked. There were a few minor steps I had to practice due to not being able to properly see them on the video. We went over the dance about 3 times (once with the piper) before deciding that none of us would fall off the stage. That was good. At that moment, a glass of water seemed to appear in my hand at that moment, which was good, because I was suddenly feeling a wee bit parched. Anyway, after a bit of chatting, we all headed back into the main hall to socialize and find the bar before the Celtic Pipes and Drums of Hawaii played their call to dinner.

After paying $14.50 for two shots of Chivas Regal and some socializing, the call to dinner was made. We followed in the pipers and found our seats, which were as far away from the stage as you could possibly get in this room. It’s from here we sat and listened to the pipers play their tunes for the next 20 minutes. Ahhh, the wonderful sounds of bagpipes. If the evening was nothing but bagpipes, I would have been just as happy. But then the pipers marched out of the room and re-entered followed as an escort to the haggis. Oh the haggis. Ok, so I stand corrected. The evening would have to be nothing but bagpipes and haggis, then I would be just as happy.

What followed next was the traditional Address to a Haggis. “…Ye Pow’rs wha mak mankind your care, And dish them out their bill o ‘fare, Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware That jaups in luggies; But, if ye wish her gratefu’ prayer, Gie her a Haggis!” As the last words were spoken, our glasses were charged, and together we all toasted the haggis.

Waiters came around the room dropping off plates of haggis to all the tables, followed by a main dinner of steak and potatoes. We didn’t have long to suck down our dinner before having to go up to dance. I focused on the haggis, although it wasn’t the best haggis had at a Burn’s Night event. But I only really get to eat it once a year, so yeah, yummy. After my dinner, just as desert was coming out, I had to go up and prepare to do our highland dance. This made me nervous seeing as how I’ve only actually danced it 3 times so far. None-the-less, swords in hand, we marched up on to the stage to the sweet sound of bagpipes and arranges our swords accordingly on the stage, bowed, and danced the Argyll Broadswords (watch us on YouTube). Technique aside, it was practically flawless. All of us, dancing in unison, finished in unison, collected our swords in unison, and marched off the stage following the bagpiper in unison. It must have been quite a sight to see because the applause was quite loud. That made me happy. I was very confident and proud.

We had a short time to rest while one of the highland dancer played a tune on her fiddle before we had to go up and do our Scottish Country dances. These dances I was sure of. Again, we walked up on to the stage and danced our two dances nearly flawlessly. There was one minor error, but we all smiled and chuckled and continued to dance, not missing a beat. It’s always better when a mistake is made and we can laugh about it instead of getting all worked up about it.

Moments after taking our bow and exiting the stage, we sat back at our table to drink some water and finish my desert. It was then that a man took the podium to introduce our guest piper Jim Motherwell. Then I realized exactly who it was I was introduced to earlier in the evening. He was not just a piper. He was the Queens piper. As in the Queen of England’s personal piper. He played the bagpipes for the Queen of England from 1998 to 2003. Now I really am glad we danced our highland dance well. We were dancing the Queen’s personal piper’s regimental dance. Phew. I’m glad I didn’t know that before I danced.

Jim Motherwell introduced himself and followed up with a few bagpipe tunes. After two tunes, he told another story about when Pres. Bill Clinton went to visit the Queen. It was a neat story that I won’t re-tell (he was a good story teller. I am not). Then he played a tune on the bagpipes that immediately made the hairs on my arm stand straight up. The song was “The Kiss” from The Last of the Mohicans soundtrack. That song has always made me just feel. I’ve never been sure exactly what, but it just makes me feel. As I listened to it played amazingly on the bagpipes, goosebumps all up my arm, I realized that the feeling I get when listening to that song is the same feeling I get when snuggled next to Holly on the couch, and I’m just so happy to have her and be with her. It was a very blissful few minutes.

Jim Motherwell received a standing ovation. He really was quite amazing. The rest of the night was quite boring in comparison. There were a few songs sung, a not-so-good toast to the lassies, a better toast to the laddies, and a long dragged out toast (that contained a little too much singing) to Robert Burns. With one last swig of nice scotch, as always, we finished the evening by all singing Auld Lang Syne.

The following morning, I was bent on getting Mary’s door finished up as soon as possible. I really wanted to go to the beer store before heading to the airport. I was informed that he was open on Sunday special because he was going to be out of town and closed for a week coming up. As early as I could I gathered up the tools and marched out to the car followed closely by Mary. I knew I would have to tear the door apart all the way down to the locking mechanism and that it would take a while. I was completely shocked that after taking off the outer shell, I realized that the door didn’t work because the handle wasn’t hooked properly to the lock wire. I hooked and secured the wire and put the panel back on. It worked. Holy bejesus it worked. It really did only take 5 minutes.

Having this free time now we decided to hop in the car and go out for breakfast. Realizing we didn’t have as much time as we thought, we decided to go to Bob’s Big Boy, which was right near the beer store, which was right near the airport. Upon arriving at Bob’s Big Boy, we found out that they were closed for renovation. And they didn’t even have the courtesy to post a list of recommendations on their front door. The nerve. Instead we went to an American/Chinese all you can eat buffet. On the front door they had a sign that read, “Due to recent frequent people leaving without paying, you must pay your bill at the time the waiter gives it to you.” Yet we still went in to eat. It was mediocre at best. But they did have corned beef and cabbage as well as ice cream. Mmmm.

Having paid for our (by this time) lunch, we drove to the beer store where I happily spent too much money on a clone recipe (Eliot Ness Lager by Great Lakes Brewing Company) and a new bottle capper. I can’t wait to try them out.

At this point it was time to leave. Mary dropped me off at the airport and I headed off through security to catch my flight. It was a very pleasant trip, but I was happy to be heading back. How I missed my family. Burn’s Night would have been better with them. At the appointed time, I hopped on the plane and it took off bound for Maui.

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Address to a Haggis
by Robert Burns (1759 – 1796)

Fair fa’ your honest, sonsie face,
Great chieftain o’ the puddin-race!
Aboon them a’ ye tak your place,
Painch, tripe, or thairm:
Weel are ye wordy of a grace
As lang’s my arm.

The groaning trencher there ye fill,
Your hurdies like a distant hill,
Your pin wad help to mend a mill
In time o’ need,
While thro’ your pores the dews distil
Like amber bead.

His knife see rustic Labour dight,
An’ cut ye up wi’ ready slight,
Trenching your gushing entrails bright
Like onie ditch;
And then, O what a glorious sight,
Warm-reekin, rich!

Then, horn for horn, they strech an’ strive:
Deil tak the hindmost! on they drive,
Till a’ their weel-swall’d kytes belyve,
Are bent like drums;
Then auld Guidman, maist like to rive,
‘Bethankit!’ hums.

Is there that owre his French ragout
Or olio that wad staw a sow,
Or fricassee wad mak her spew
Wi’ perfect sconner,
Looks down wi’ sneering, scornfu’ view
On sic a dinner?

Poor devil! see him owre his trash,
As feckless as a wither’d rash,
His spindle shank, a guid whip-lash,
His nieve a nit;
Thro’ bluidy flood or field to dash,
O how unfit!

But mark the Rustic, haggis-fed,
The trembling earth resounds his tread.
Clap in his walie nieve a blade,
He’ll make it whissle;
An’ legs, an’ arms, an’ heads will sned,
Like taps o’ thrissle.

Ye Pow’rs wha mak mankind your care,
And dish them out their bill o ‘fare,
Auld Scotland wants nae skinking ware
That jaups in luggies;
But, if ye wish her gratefu’ prayer,
Gie her a Haggis!

Trip to Seven Pools

Posted on January 25, 2010 by Michael McIntosh

There are only a few weeks left for Holly to finish up the illustrations for her third children’s book. She’s been working mostly during the evenings after the boys have gone to bed. But on Saturday, I gave her some dedicated time during the day to get a bit done totally boy free.

At noon, I packed up two bags of recycling, readied some bills for mailing, grabbed a box full of donation toys, strapped the kids in the car, and headed south.

Our first and closest stop was the local thrift store. Yes, we have one. We dropped off our box of forgotten toys and gossiped a bit with the landlord’s girlfriend. Oh the drama. 20 or so minutes later we drove off with two pairs of sweatpants for Gavin, a awesome Gap winter hat for Leif, a few toys and a Star Wars book with a skull on the cover that Gavin won’t look at.

From there we made a quick pitstop at the post office to drop some letters in the mail before stopping at Hasegawa’s to take care of our recycling. The three of us all took turns inserting the diet coke cans into the machine, watching the door close, and listening to the machine crush the cans. Leif was very interested in the going ons. He helped grab cans out of the bag and even putting them in the machine. Oh what fun. We earned $4.05. That plus the $2 in my wallet was enough to buy a musubi, lemonade, and Life Savers gummies for Gavin along with a Milky Way for Leif. Recycling is good.

Here is where I had t make a decision. What to do next. By this time, the sun had finally come out and warmed us up a bit. Gavin had a bathing suit in the trunk for some reason so I decided to take a trip down to seven pools to see if we could do some swimming. Besides, if anything, it’s a beautiful drive. So that is what we did.

After 20 or so minutes of driving, we neared the parking area. Lief started to look a bit sleepy right as we were pulling up. If he could only hold off a few minutes longer. I pulled up to the little booth at the entrance and after a 5 minute spiel about how the waterfalls are all down to a slow trickle and there is no swimming due to stagnant water, she then asked me for a $10 parking fee. I only had $5. But who wants to pay $5 to hike with a sleeping baby to a trickling waterfall that you can’t even swim in? Not me. So I let Leif pass out and we turned around to take a slow scenic trip home.

It was only 2 pm when we arrived home. Holly worked for 2 straight hours on her illustrations. Good progress. She was glad to see us back home. The rest of the day was a nice relaxing one full of happy children, yummy snacks, tv, and beer.

I love days like that.

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Beer and Cockroaches

Posted on January 13, 2010 by Michael McIntosh

Today was another furlough day for Holly. Holly being home meant that I was able to ride Gavin to school on the motorcycle. A a matter of fact, I was able to ride my motorcycle twice today. After my work meeting, I rode to the post office to pick up my beer supplies. As I walked into the post office, the clerk sees me and says, “There’s a package for you. And it’s leaking”. He explained to me how if he put it on one side, the leak seems to stop. I poked the wet spots on the sides and corner of the box and gave it a sniff. Not malty. Not yeasty. That is a good sign. That means that it is most likely just the ice pack melting. Sure enough, that was the case. So I bundled it in all in my back pack and headed home.

I’ve been waiting for these supplies. This is my test batch of beer for my upcoming brew in NY. I’ll have one week from brew to bottle. I don’t think it will reach it’s full potential in that time, but I do think that it will be quite tasty and delicious. The recipe is a version of the Scottish Old Jock Ale. If all goes well it will be a beautiful amber color with a red/orange highlight and have a great malty taste with a hint of bitterness. I’m looking forward to tasting it. I’ve made my yeast starter and will brew in two days.

Going in a completely gross direction now, our car has been taken over by cockroaches. Every time we open the door, we see them scatter into the cracks and under the seats. The past two weeks we’ve gone to town to buy groceries, we’ve arrived at home with either a loaf of bread full of cockroaches, backpacks full of cockroaches, cookie bags full of cockroaches, and so on and so forth. They live in the truck, under the seats, in the dashboard, in every little crevice in the car. So when I went to the post office today, I also stopped at the general store to pick up a bug bomb. We are going clean out our car. Then we are going to bomb our car. Then we are going to build a mass grave in our vacuum cleaner. If you’re lucky, we’ll even take pictures of it. Muahaha.

Meanwhile, Holly models her new steal from Old Navy whilst Gavin sits not eating his dinner. Life is good.

$60 Laundry Day

Posted on January 12, 2010 by Michael McIntosh

This past weekend we went to town with one thing in mind. Wash laundry. We’ve been saving up for a month now and as a result, we spent roughly $60 on washing our clothes. Of that $60, about $10 went towards clothes that no longer fit any of us or were getting to old or we just didn’t want any more for one reason or another. We filled two garbage bags full of these clothes and dropped them off at the nearest donation spot, Savers. After doing this, we felt pretty good about ourselves so we headed off to Old Navy as a reward. We left with handfuls of amazing on-sale winter clothes. Holly found the coat she was depressed about not buying last year (it was $90). She took the last one in her size for $19. We also bought long sleeve shirts, gloves, hats, scarves, pants, and I even bought a really comfy winter jacket. It was amazing. And the best part is that only the two jackets were over $7.

NY is only a month away now. I’m planning on making a batch of beer while I’m there. It would be pretty cool to be able to make a beer for my family. It will also be somewhat of an experiment. Brew to bottle in 1 week. Should be interesting.